I am listening again and again to this parable of the Pharisee and the sinner and I don’t know… I am still looking for someone here. I am looking for a third person in that temple, one that is neither over the top self-righteous nor beating him or herself up in self-flagellation. I am looking for someone representing the middle ground. I know, Jesus is using hyperbole and parody here in order to make a very important point. He exposes self-righteousness in its spiritual ugliness. But still, most people lead their lives somewhere between these two extremes; more than 90% of us – and I actually hope 100% of us, -are somewhere in the middle between those two characters. Sometimes we feel bad about ourselves… and other times we are pretty upbeat about who we are and what we do. Usually we are not as bad as we feel about ourselves at our worst moments in life; and usually we are not quite as wonderful as we think we are when fortune and hard work combine to produce our glory moments.
So, let me introduce a third person to this temple scene. How would a person who is more like you and me figure into this parable? Let’s do a little thought experiment… If you entered the temple or church at the very moment when this unhealthy dialogue is about to transpire, if you become a witness of this scene, how do you react?
Some of us would go hide in a pew, pretend to pray, eavesdrop and then go tell the story of this big shot clergy man who thinks he is bigger than life to some of our friends with unmistakable glee. Perhaps we even got a quick picture on our I-phone capturing the pontificating clergyman. And now his likeness grins at us from our Face Book page with the caption: Hypocrite! Well, that would make us a serious competitor for the hypocrisy crown, wouldn’t it?
Some of us would leave the sanctuary quietly as this scene is playing out and afterwards, equally quietly, approach the downcast man trying to figure out how we can help him. Why is he so down on himself? What are his problems? Can we find him a good therapist or maybe a new job, as he is contemplating to give up his $ 100,000 a year tax collecting gig, due to ethical qualms? We would never show our contempt for the Pharisee openly, but deep in our hearts we reserve nothing but disgust for him and his ways. And while this approach would figure to be much less hypocritical and much more “Christian,” it would still leave us in the trap of comparing ourselves favorably to this hypocrite… Which makes us only – a lesser hypocrite!
Some in our community would never get the opportunity to observe this scene because they are simply not often enough in the church or temple to have that chance. But let’s not go there, lest I compare myself to “those other people” and become a hypocrite myself – from the pulpit no less!
Some in our community would enter the church for the first time in, let’s say, three years, just to stumble upon this clergy man and his ill-advised remarks and they would say, “See, that’s why I haven’t been in church, because they are all hypocrites!” -Which makes you – a pretty judgmental person.
Some of us would observe this whole dialogue and carefully think about it at home and say, “Finally someone is speaking his mind. Enough of this political correctness stuff! This tax collector needed to hear the truth and the clergy man, while he was perhaps a little full of himself, at least tells it like it is!” The outcome of this reaction would be heard at the next council meeting: “We need to be tougher on people who slack their responsibilities.” And the point of Jesus’ teaching would be totally missed, while hypocrisy crept in unimpeded.
As I came up with possibility over realistic possibility of how people like you and me might react to this fictional dialogue from the gospel of Luke, I started wondering: how do you actually avoid the hypocrisy trap? I mean, as you witness this kind of behavior, you are almost automatically drawn into the spiral of comparison and condemnation. You will almost certainly react to it, taking sides, probably judging and displaying a certain amount of hypocrisy yourself, not because you are such a bad person, but just by virtue of engaging in this scene. And then I thought: is it possible to react to this behavior in a healthy way and what would that look like?
Now we are in difficult territory, because it is so much easier to walk away, form opinions, spew frustrations, distancing ourselves and leaving those characters alone while making fun of them. But what if if we talked to each of them as a brother, knowing that we are capable of some of the same flaws they’re displaying, even if, deep in our righteous hearts we think, “no way are we as bad as he is!”? Is it possible to confront the Pharisee about his behavior without making him an object of our gossip and contempt? It would probably be very difficult to have that conversation, especially confronting a person in power, but just for the sake of the thought experiment: wouldn’t it be the only right thing to do? And the poor sinner: let’s not allow him to get off the hook here, just because he seems to be so much more genuine and contrite. There is probably stuff he has to clean up and helping him find the courage to do that without sanctifying him too quickly would be a good idea. Sometimes people become professionals at displaying remorse without actually ever changing their ways, and that is just as sinful as self-righteousness.
You know, I still struggle with the right approach or the approach I might take upon witnessing the scene. It’s not easy. But we all need to negotiate how to respond to negative comments in our environment without taking on the same negativity. It’s an ongoing challenge and I virtually don’t know anybody who is not confronted with it at times. Maybe we need to admit to ourselves that we are struggling with this as a first step. It doesn’t hurt either to ask God for wisdom, to pray that we might find the right approach. And it doesn’t hurt to experiment and then discern some of our approaches (humor sometimes does wonders) and see whether they worked or not, whether they made a positive difference. And if not, go back to the drawing board and try again. To me, that’s what being a Christian, a follower of Christ, is about: trying to do what is Christ-like, searching for the center, the way Jesus would approach things, which is at the same time exciting and difficult. May God bless you, inspire you, love you and help you to respond in healthy ways to the dialogues you listen to wherever you are – and not least to the ones that are taking place in your own heart every day. And as you listen to those dialogues, please remember that you are loved. And that other person who, for some bad reason, produces so much negativity, is loved too. He or she just might not know it yet.
Amen.